Abandoning plans and accepting the process

I had the BEST conversation last night with one of my artist friends. I had been floundering lately about what sort of body of work I should do next. I had an idea about it, but I felt unsure about it until I spoke with her.

She asked me some key questions about it that made me see it all clearly, like what exactly was interesting to me about the idea, and I found that there wasn't anything specifically interesting to me about it at all, and therefore, it was not a good enough idea for a whole body of work.

I realized, I was putting the cart before the horse, so to speak. And I was thinking too much about what would be interesting to display in a show instead of what was going to hold my own interest. It's very important (for me) to be engaged in the painting process, and to also have fun - while also challenging myself. I work instinctively usually, so making such a plan before I had even started on painting one was not the way to go.

What was interesting to me about my idea was not the imagery itself, but the narrative behind the forms. I had been telling myself that I need to take out the narrative in my work because some people don't like it, or I'm doing it too much, or blah blah blah. But I came to the conclusion that WHAT I will be painting is a lot less important than how I approach it. It's a matter of trusting myself to pull it all together as I go along. I can't stress enough how important it is to ignore all the self-doubt or outside validation in cases like this.

Now I can make the first piece, and that's all that matters. Because the first will inform the next - and rather than a laid out plan, I will watch and discover what comes into being.

I am so excited, I thought I'd share that. :)

...whether it's uninteresting or interesting doesn't really matter. I am just high on being an artist at the moment.